Chundles

I'm telling you, Hollywood couldn't have scripted something more brilliant than what we learned Illinois Governor Rod Blagojevich has been up to for the last year. The whole affidavit was nearly 80 pages, but here are some excerpts from a CNN.com article detailing some of his indiscretions:

Trying to get some critics from the Chicago Tribune editorial board fired in exchange for state money to assist in the sale of Wrigley Field.

As the governor delicately put it in his demand for a quid pro quo to his deputy; "fire those f---ers." Charming. Watch the prosecutor lay out the case »

And then, as if no one would notice -- or believe -- the crooked governor was behind the brilliant idea, he suggested his chief of staff, John Harris, make the suggestion, "not me." As if that would confuse the feds.

The stupidity (I'm running out of synonyms here) is only compounded when the governor decides it would be a good idea to raffle off Barack Obama's Senate seat to the highest bidder.

And, if no one bid high enough, then he just might take the seat himself. "If ... they're not going to offer anything of value, then I might just take it," the governor said.

Later, the governor put it more, er, succinctly: The Senate seat "is a f---ing valuable thing, you just don't give it away for nothing."

Maybe an ambassadorship. Maybe an appointment as Health and Human Services secretary -- a "trade" as he put it. Or maybe Energy, a loyal aide suggested, because that department is "the one that makes the most money."

Now we're all getting nauseated.

But it gets worse. Ever the caring hubby, he's looking out for his wife's bottom line, wondering aloud to his top staffer "if there is a play here, with these guys, with her" to work for a lobbying firm in Washington or New York at a better salary. Pay to play? Gee, wonder if the feds listening in got a laugh out of that one. Watch Sen. Durbin say 'it's a say day' for Illinois »

And here's the coup de grace: This governor, who apparently hasn't been paying attention to anything Obama has said over the past two years, wonders aloud what he can get from Obama.

His general counsel, ever helpful, suggests that maybe Obama would get the gov's wife on some corporate boards, according to the criminal complaint. Really? Is that something Obama -- who won't even hire lobbyists for his administration -- would do?

Seriously, this is straight out of a Sopranos episode. Scratch that. This is straight out of an entire season of the Sopranos. All I can say is that I'm glad the Feds actually used their resources to do something good. This guy is a crook and will hopefully spend a long time behind bars. The people of Illinois deserve better.